nicinchic wrote:Good god pie lady. I just dry heaved at my desk. That is the worst! I think you win.

I was never more disturbed. Not even when I found a plastic garbage bag tie in a pasta dish in '98.

To solidify my winning, you know how when you eat soup with thin little noodles and some stick to your molars? I wondered how many of those were really noodles. And then I brushed my teeth like never before.

Hot mustard. Yes, I am talking about the typical hot mustard you get in a Chinese restaurant. We went to Lotus in Elmwood Park and we sat down inside the restaurant which was cozy. I love hot mustard but the crap they brought out with our appetizers was no where near the texture of hot mustard. It tasted and looked very watered down. Why? I have no clue. Also Mr. KajmacJohnson said his plain white rice had no taste while the fried rice that came with our appetizer platter was just as bland and one note and my fried noodles with the soggy limp tofu could not be qualified as fried or something with flavor. Yep, it's back to the drawing board in trying to find a decent Chinese place to eat. Need to go back to Orange Garden on Irving Park.

KajmacJohnson wrote:Hot mustard. Yes, I am talking about the typical hot mustard you get in a Chinese restaurant. We went to Lotus in Elmwood Park and we sat down inside the restaurant which was cozy. I love hot mustard but the crap they brought out with our appetizers was no where near the texture of hot mustard. It tasted and looked very watered down. Why? I have no clue. Also Mr. KajmacJohnson said his plain white rice had no taste while the fried rice that came with our appetizer platter was just as bland and one note and my fried noodles with the soggy limp tofu could not be qualified as fried or something with flavor. Yep, it's back to the drawing board in trying to find a decent Chinese place to eat. Need to go back to Orange Garden on Irving Park.

Interesting. I get carryout/delivery from Lotus on a regular basis and I find their food to be much better than most other Chinese in the area. I can't say that I have had the Tofu dish ever, but I find their Chicken with Black bean to be one of the best around anywhere. I'm not sure "plain white rice" is supposed to have any taste.

thetrob wrote:

KajmacJohnson wrote:Hot mustard. Yes, I am talking about the typical hot mustard you get in a Chinese restaurant. We went to Lotus in Elmwood Park and we sat down inside the restaurant which was cozy. I love hot mustard but the crap they brought out with our appetizers was no where near the texture of hot mustard. It tasted and looked very watered down. Why? I have no clue. Also Mr. KajmacJohnson said his plain white rice had no taste while the fried rice that came with our appetizer platter was just as bland and one note and my fried noodles with the soggy limp tofu could not be qualified as fried or something with flavor. Yep, it's back to the drawing board in trying to find a decent Chinese place to eat. Need to go back to Orange Garden on Irving Park.

Interesting. I get carryout/delivery from Lotus on a regular basis and I find their food to be much better than most other Chinese in the area. I can't say that I have had the Tofu dish ever, but I find their Chicken with Black bean to be one of the best around anywhere. I'm not sure "plain white rice" is supposed to have any taste.

True. Plain white rice is just rice but to my husband he says he can taste some semblence of flavor at times but the white rice tasted like nothing in this case as in no rice at all. Kind of hard to explain. The tofu was just not very good and soft and limp is not the way to go. All around teh food was pretty flavorless and mediocre except for a few the appetizers and the soups that came with our meals. We went here on the basis of my stepdaughter who swears it is pretty good Chinese for the Elmwood Park area. Yep, just so not in a hurry to go back and get a heaping helping of tasteless food with watered down hot mustard. No.

The glazed turkey ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins. I ordered a Butter Pecan ice cream cake in the glazed turkey shape with yellow cake about 3 weeks ago. I could tell when I called and a 12-year-old answered that I was in trouble; she had a flippant attitude and someone in back had to prompt her on what to ask, like, "what flavor ice cream do you want" and "what flavor cake?" I knew after I hung up that I would not be receiving my cake.

Boy, was I right. I told no one but my husband and sister-in-law that I was ordering this, and I never told them at which location I was picking it up. I walked in and lo, they didn't have my order. Why? "Someone called and cancelled it." Yep, there was a giant CANCELLED written across the bottom. Really? Who called? My alter ego? My sister-in-law, thinking, hey, I'll just send them there anyway to waste their time! Or maybe Mr. Pie, who calls businesses in his sleep to cancel stuff.

"Luckily", they had two other turkey cakes in the freezer: Oreo and Vanilla. To appease the masses, I chose vanilla. Well, it not only looked nothing like the picture but it was Oreo ice cream. And there was no cake. It was a vaguely turkey-shaped mound of ice cream covered in overly sweet, melted, caramel-flavored goo that looked less like the color of roast turkey and more like gravy snot.

Mr. Baskin Robbins is going to get quite a letter from me. $30 for this, too.

Al Pastor Taco from Taco/Burrito King that just opened near Sears Tower. Awful. Pork had no taste and they slathered it with a bunch of white sauce of some kind and put lettuce and some other things on there. To remind myself of what a decent al pastor (and just decent) al pastor taco can taste like, I walked around the corner to La Cucina and had one with cilantro and onion, and no mysterious white sauce for $1.50. Much better.

This message is for KajmacJohnson a couple posts above...

The is not a WORST post but a GOOD post...

try this place.. I'm no expert on hot mustard... but a friend I took said it was good. I go almost every Tuesday for the Orange Chicken special !!!

China Gate
9705 Franklin Ave
Franklin Park, IL 60131
(847) 455-2720

jazzman wrote:This message is for KajmacJohnson a couple posts above...

The is not a WORST post but a GOOD post...

Hahaha! Thanks, Jazzman!

try this place.. I'm no expert on hot mustard... but a friend I took said it was good. I go almost every Tuesday for the Orange Chicken special !!!

China Gate
9705 Franklin Ave
Franklin Park, IL 60131
(847) 455-2720

Thanks for the tip. We are in the Elmwood Park/Oak Park/River Forest area quite a bit because my husband's elderly aunt lives there and we end up eating and grocery shopping in the area weekly. My sister-n-law also resides near Franklin Park so this may definately come in handy one of these days.

Pie Lady wrote:The glazed turkey ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins. I ordered a Butter Pecan ice cream cake in the glazed turkey shape with yellow cake about 3 weeks ago. I could tell when I called and a 12-year-old answered that I was in trouble; she had a flippant attitude and someone in back had to prompt her on what to ask, like, "what flavor ice cream do you want" and "what flavor cake?" I knew after I hung up that I would not be receiving my cake.

Boy, was I right. I told no one but my husband and sister-in-law that I was ordering this, and I never told them at which location I was picking it up. I walked in and lo, they didn't have my order. Why? "Someone called and cancelled it." Yep, there was a giant CANCELLED written across the bottom. Really? Who called? My alter ego? My sister-in-law, thinking, hey, I'll just send them there anyway to waste their time! Or maybe Mr. Pie, who calls businesses in his sleep to cancel stuff.

"Luckily", they had two other turkey cakes in the freezer: Oreo and Vanilla. To appease the masses, I chose vanilla. Well, it not only looked nothing like the picture but it was Oreo ice cream. And there was no cake. It was a vaguely turkey-shaped mound of ice cream covered in overly sweet, melted, caramel-flavored goo that looked less like the color of roast turkey and more like gravy snot.

Mr. Baskin Robbins is going to get quite a letter from me. $30 for this, too.

That does sound like an awful waste of money but anything with Baskin Robbins in the title automatically qualifies as worst thing in my book. Never understood why such bland and tasteless ice cream is so popular.

Soy Glazed tuna collar at the Bristol.

To harken back to Alvie Singer's opening lines in Annie Hall, the food was awful, and the portions were so small.
I've enjoyed yellowtail collar in the past, but tuna collar may be a cut of fish that should not be eaten, it is certainly hard to figure out how it could be successfully broiled. What meat there was was either lean flesh, which was cooked past well-done, or dark connective tissue which had enough moisture but had a bitter taste. I'm a big fan of mackerel and bluefish so I'm not afraid of oily, or fishy flesh, but this stuff was hard to get down.

To top it all off the price was $32 for a dish that looked big, but provided less sustenance than a small filet.

The rest of the meal ranged from good to excellent, so don't avoid the Bristol, just avoid the tuna collar.

I was deceived: Out of town, I was taken to a restaurant by the name of Mimi's (no choice in the matter). I had never heard of this place before, and I initially suspected it was some local breakfast spot. But as we approached it, it screamed chain restaurant to me (and suspicions were later confirmed). In any event, everything I tasted screamed retirement community food on steroids - Thai peanut chicken wrap was awful . . . a cardboard encased sandwich with pure crap on the inside . . . let's just leave it at that. I tasted an omelet, a muffin, and some other stuff, and it was all real bad. I won't be fooled again . . .

Bleeding Heart donuts! GAH! Honestly they should close the whole place down, tried 2 donuts and quiche and they were horrible. I don't know how such an "established" place could so easily serve a product so poor. It is so irresponsible. Between that and the service I had in my 1 experience - I just can't go back.

Athenos garlic hummus. Disgusting. A cat's ass would have had a more pleasant flavor.

Suzy Creamcheese wrote:Athenos garlic hummus. Disgusting. A cat's ass would have had a more pleasant flavor.

Are we doing banner quotes again soon?

I ate a tube of lipstick for money.
Here's the thing, since it goes on your lips, the shit they make it out of is fairly water-resistant. It smeared on the roof of my mouth and clung to it like Thompson's Water Seal.
Every time I breathed in, it smelled like the inside of an old purse. I was miserable for the rest of the day.

Sian27 wrote:I ate a tube of lipstick for money.
Here's the thing, since it goes on your lips, the shit they make it out of is fairly water-resistant. It smeared on the roof of my mouth and clung to it like Thompson's Water Seal.
Every time I breathed in, it smelled like the inside of an old purse. I was miserable for the rest of the day.

That's it, mods, please lock this thread - this guy wins

Sian27 wrote:I ate a tube of lipstick for money.

How much money?

That's what I was wondering!

Khaopaat wrote:That's it, mods, please lock this thread - this guy wins

Why do you assume it's a guy?

Sian27 wrote:I ate a tube of lipstick for money.

Oh, right.

i agree most trader joes frozen meals are complete garbage and over priced stick to cooking yourself better off every time then you can only get mad at yourself

Santander wrote:Barbecue chicken pizza from Kinderhook Tap in Oak Park.

Stale flour tortillas with ketchup, liquid smoke, flavorless mozzarella, and rubbery post-chicken. Served already cut and separated into haphazard brown islands (almost like individual nachos). In a life of dining, I have never been served anything less ready for primetime than this plate. Then something plastic caught fire in the kitchen and the place was inundated with acrid chemical smoke. Beers were good.

Oh, man, were you ever right about this -- and am I ever sad I didn't check this post before I stopped by Kinderhook for drinks last week.



This was about as disgraceful a restaurant snack as I can remember.

We ran into Giovanna and mhl, and to my everlasting regret (and theirs, I'm sure) I neglected to warn them about this bad-joke-on-a-plate (I got a perturbed email the next day; I should have told them).

Beers were good ( )

Pineapple sorbetto at Bar Toma last night... has this funky, almost metallic taste to it. First thing I've sent back in a restaurant in years!

The kids' pizza at the D'Agostino's in Wrigleyville. It was so sweet, it tasted like candy. I only ate the second slice because I was still hungry. Mr. Pie said to take it home and he'd try it for breakfast, otherwise I would have asked for my money back.

Pie Lady -- i actually ordered a pizza from D'Agostino's about two weeks ago and that pizza sauce was just disgusting. I'd had a pizza from their location that's down near Wicker Park and it was a normal sauce -- not sweet, not spicy. So when I saw them delivering up to A-ville, I thought it would be good. Au Contraire. i couldn't even finish one piece and it was almost $30 bucks down the drain. It was if they had taken a bottle of corn syrup and just poured it into the tomatoes. Really really disappointing.

I don't remember if I'd had the "adult" pizza before. Mr. Pie suggested that the sauce may have been sweetened to appease the tykes, but I guess I could expect the same sweetness either way. That's a shame. The salad I had with it (I forget the name, but it had cranberries, nuts, blue cheese, etc.) was very good.

John Danza wrote:

zoid wrote:Swiss & mushroom burger and fries from the Aramark run cafeteria in my work building.

I think any food item from any building cafeteria would make it to this thread.

A more accurate statement would be that any food purchased from an ARA cafeteria is probably pretty bad.

Yeah, Baskin Robbins...why is it still in business?

And, weirdly enough, on a business trip to Mumbai, there was a Baskin Robbins across the street from my hotel.

KajmacJohnson wrote:

Pie Lady wrote:The glazed turkey ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins. I ordered a Butter Pecan ice cream cake in the glazed turkey shape with yellow cake about 3 weeks ago. I could tell when I called and a 12-year-old answered that I was in trouble; she had a flippant attitude and someone in back had to prompt her on what to ask, like, "what flavor ice cream do you want" and "what flavor cake?" I knew after I hung up that I would not be receiving my cake.

Boy, was I right. I told no one but my husband and sister-in-law that I was ordering this, and I never told them at which location I was picking it up. I walked in and lo, they didn't have my order. Why? "Someone called and cancelled it." Yep, there was a giant CANCELLED written across the bottom. Really? Who called? My alter ego? My sister-in-law, thinking, hey, I'll just send them there anyway to waste their time! Or maybe Mr. Pie, who calls businesses in his sleep to cancel stuff.

"Luckily", they had two other turkey cakes in the freezer: Oreo and Vanilla. To appease the masses, I chose vanilla. Well, it not only looked nothing like the picture but it was Oreo ice cream. And there was no cake. It was a vaguely turkey-shaped mound of ice cream covered in overly sweet, melted, caramel-flavored goo that looked less like the color of roast turkey and more like gravy snot.

Mr. Baskin Robbins is going to get quite a letter from me. $30 for this, too.

That does sound like an awful waste of money but anything with Baskin Robbins in the title automatically qualifies as worst thing in my book. Never understood why such bland and tasteless ice cream is so popular.

DKoblesky wrote:Yeah, Baskin Robbins...why is it still in business?

And, weirdly enough, on a business trip to Mumbai, there was a Baskin Robbins across the street from my hotel.

KajmacJohnson wrote:

Pie Lady wrote:The glazed turkey ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins. I ordered a Butter Pecan ice cream cake in the glazed turkey shape with yellow cake about 3 weeks ago. I could tell when I called and a 12-year-old answered that I was in trouble; she had a flippant attitude and someone in back had to prompt her on what to ask, like, "what flavor ice cream do you want" and "what flavor cake?" I knew after I hung up that I would not be receiving my cake.

Boy, was I right. I told no one but my husband and sister-in-law that I was ordering this, and I never told them at which location I was picking it up. I walked in and lo, they didn't have my order. Why? "Someone called and cancelled it." Yep, there was a giant CANCELLED written across the bottom. Really? Who called? My alter ego? My sister-in-law, thinking, hey, I'll just send them there anyway to waste their time! Or maybe Mr. Pie, who calls businesses in his sleep to cancel stuff.

"Luckily", they had two other turkey cakes in the freezer: Oreo and Vanilla. To appease the masses, I chose vanilla. Well, it not only looked nothing like the picture but it was Oreo ice cream. And there was no cake. It was a vaguely turkey-shaped mound of ice cream covered in overly sweet, melted, caramel-flavored goo that looked less like the color of roast turkey and more like gravy snot.

Mr. Baskin Robbins is going to get quite a letter from me. $30 for this, too.

That does sound like an awful waste of money but anything with Baskin Robbins in the title automatically qualifies as worst thing in my book. Never understood why such bland and tasteless ice cream is so popular.

I forgot to mention that they were tripping over themselves with apologies and attempts to reach me. They had to get my address to compensate me. I trembled with anticipation as I opened the envelope...there was a card good for a free coffee and doughnut. The kicker? There are two BRs within walking distance of my home, yet the card was good at neither of them. The closest location was in Des Plaines, about a 30 minute trip. I sent the card to my sister-in-law so she can use it at the same location that screwed me.

And now that they've discontinued the buttermilk donut, there's not a damn thing on offer worth making the trip for. And I say this as someone who has a location four blocks away.

Sam's Club snack counter whatever the heck it is called, sausage slice of pizza. Right out of the oven. Unfortunately, it was tasteless with a crust that could barely support a spoonful of sauce. Hey, I was not expecting culinary genius work here, but something with maybe a little bit of flavor. Their take and bake pizza for home is miles better.