Thanks for the re-direct Amata and and Kenny Z thanks for the tip. Thankfully no ants today, though I was really hoping at least one of the morels would yield some critters so I could scare my girlfriend. Next time.
I've never eaten carbonara, only read about it. Same goes for morels. This situation is symptomatic of the internet/food age where any number of us can identify obscure preparations and ingredients, even wax poetic about authentic techniques and recite genealogical histories of a dish, without ever having eaten the damn thing. Strange, ironic, mildly depressing.
Armed with such superficial knowledge and with IPhone in hand, dialed in on an LTH thread about carbonara, I set out to cook dinner. I decided to add morels because I recall reading that morels take well to being sauteed in fats, and carbonara seemed simple enough. Plus bacon, eggs and cheese sounded pretty damn good.
$90 bucks at Fox and Obel later (including a $40 Groupon) I had two bags of morels, a 1/4 pound of Guanciale, two bottles of Italian wine (white, red), some fettucini and assorted charcuterie. Forgot the pecorino though, so I used reggiano instead.
Guanciale, garlic, parmesan.

Morels, split, rinsed quick.

Chopped guanciale.

Chopped parmesan.

Morels and guanciale, after guanciale had been browned for about 15 minutes on a low flame.

Morels and guanciale after hanging out together for 10 minutes. I deglazed with white wine after this.

Eggs, parmesan, parsley, lots of black pepper.

Drain pasta, add egg mixture, beat furiously until creamy, add guanciale/morels/rendered fat, continue to beat and serve.


The results:
The pasta was toothsome and the sauce was perfectly creamy - no scrambled eggs or chunks of parmesan. The parsley provided a nice relief from the unctuous flavors. The guanciale overwhelmed the morels a bit, but they came together in a powerfully funky and porky cacophony that reminded me a bit of Southeast Asian food (sub fermented fish for morels). Everyone loved the dish. It could use some work - especially to bring out the flavors of the morel more, but all in all, a success.
"By the fig, the olive..." Surat Al-Teen, Mecca 95:1"