help with my manners, please..going to Alinea

Hi- I have only been to a few high-end places to dine. I feel kind of uncomfortable and make small mistakes sometimes, like <horrors> pouring my own water from the water bottle sitting at the table instead of letting the waiter do it, and getting a dirty look from him. I am going to Alinea soon, and would like some advice on anything I should know particular to that restaurant.

I know they give you instructions on most items, but what if you mess it up? Do they hover around or are they nice about it? How do the wine pairings work? I think someone in another thread mentioned they were not sure if they could pour more of a particular wine bottle that was on the table.. do they take it away? are you supposed to drink as much or little as you want? if you pour it yourself is that a gaffe?

anyhow, just insecure about this, what's your advice people who have been to alinea, etc?

thx

Generally if wines are being paired the sommelier will pour for you and remove the bottle. And mostly it's just a tasting portion to accompany the dish, so it's smaller than a regular glass, but by no means are you required to finish the entire glass if you don't want to. But, if the bottle is left at the table, the sommelier should be the one to pour it.

Please be assured, that as long as you're not lacking basic table manners, there's no "messing up" involved in fine dining. Servers are there to accomodate you, and if a dish is meant to be eaten in a very specific manner for a particular effect, they'll inform you.

Getting a dirty look from a server because you poured your own water is uncalled for... if your glass was that low, they should have been on top of it themselves to refill your glass. Remember that anyone who treats you poorly has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.

Don't be insecure about a meal, it's meant to be enjoyed. Enjoy it as you please.

Not to mention which, based on both personal experience and others' reports, Alinea is rather on the warm and friendly end of the fine dining service spectrum. I expect you'll feel quite comfortable.

I went to Alinea with two vegans, two aging punk rockers who haven't worn jackets since they're respective wedding dates, and a woman headed to the ER after dinner because her doctor believed she might have a kidney stone. We had animated conversation and lots of laughs, and I'm guessing we committed an etiquette gaffe or two during the night.

The Alinea staff took all in good humor and treated us like we mattered. Even better, they don't take themselves overly seriously (our sommelier relayed in rather colorful detail the story of passing his own kidney stone -- and this was over our first course!). Maybe it's because the food is playful, or maybe because the chef and his staff know they're turning out exceptional food for appreciative guests, but I found the service to be the warmest and most forgiving I've ever experienced.

Honestly, I think you'll do fine. There's no such thing as messing up, because who really comes in *knowing* how to deal with the lavendar pillow? Or the dehydrated bacon with no utensil? This makes the whole Alinea experience an equalizer of sorts.

Go, enjoy, mess up a little, and laugh about it then and later. I'd say the only expectations are showing respect for the food and the staff, which I promise will be reciprocated.

Relax -- the folks at Alinea will make you feel very comfortable. The service is surprisingly relaxed for upscale service. So be yourself and have a great time. I've been to places that feel "stuffy" and Alinea is not one of them. Enjoy and let us know how you enjoyed your meal.

ChristyP wrote:Honestly, I think you'll do fine. There's no such thing as messing up, because who really comes in *knowing* how to deal with the lavendar pillow? Or the dehydrated bacon with no utensil? This makes the whole Alinea experience an equalizer of sorts.

So true. When you're being presented with a whole new set of "rules" for eating, it's understood that you won't execute everything flawlessly.

I remember when Ruhlman was interviewing Achatz at Steppenwolf, someone asks if he thought his food and table service "frightened" people, and Achatz said he hoped not but that Victorian table service frightened him -- because, I assume, there's so many ways to mess it up.

thanks all, this makes me feel better about it already. I'm sure I'll have a great time!

To get back to the wine pairings-- I would absolutely NOT feel obliged to finish every glass. You may get hammered early in the meal on lighter whites that way. If you like a wine, drink it, if you don't, just have a little with the food. Another will be coming soon.

I would echo what everyone else has said. I think one of the wonderful things about Alinea is that, despite their now national and international reputation, the service is warm and friendly. I am certain you will have a wonderful dining experience.

Jyoti

Exactly what you need, written by fellow LTHer Crrush.

Mere Mortal's Guide to Fine Dining

I have a copy and it's an interesting read no matter your level of dining sophistication.

Enjoy,
Gary

Hi,

Alinea has so many unique presentations, that it defies conventional manners. How often does the guest do the final assembly of food at the table? The waiters guide you through everything.

As a statistically off the radar drinker, I was amused how the evening's presentations got more complex with some potential danger as the evening wore on. Food presented at the end of a lengthy, swaying wire which a miscalculation by the diner could puncture their mouth. Foods mounted on pins with each item carefully explained, then the waiter whisks away just as quickly as memory does a purge. It's all fun and simultaneously adventurous eating.

We learned this by happenstance on my only visit earlier this year: you can get second portions, but it is up to the Chef's discretion.

Try to get yourself at a table with chairs. We were first seated where half the table was in chairs and others on a deep bench. The deep bench meant you would be seating on the edge with no back support for 4 hours. I think that is not the best position to be in.

Enjoy and let us know how your experience unfolded.

Regards,

The old stereotypes of the "fancy" restaurant barely holds today. Dining has become more casual, and servers are rarely from the old school where they believe that you are doing them a favor by dining with them. This is particularly true at Alinea and other modern American restaurants.

I just returned from dining at Alinea this evening, and the service was both gracious and friendly. As long as you treat the server as a professional, they will treat you as a respected client. They want you to enjoy yourself, to return, and to spread the good word.

The menu is terrific and the staff is very accommodating. You will have a memorable evening. Tell us about it.

Also, if you want less wine, or to skip a pairing or whatever, they not only will do so, but they will charge you less