Enjoyed the cooking, though not the meal

Has anyone else been victim to that great spiritual depressant that is the instance of one's appetite for the food one cooks for others being nearly evaporated upon serving it to said others?

I would say that at least 50% of the time I slave over a complicated meal for a significant other and finally serve it up, I find that I really have no interest in eating it, though it may be lovable indeed, and sometimes it revolts me.

Perhaps this is a sign that I should be a professional chef instead of a writer.

ParkerS wrote:Has anyone else been victim to that great spiritual depressant that is the instance of one's appetite for the food one cooks for others being nearly evaporated upon serving it to said others?

I would say that at least 50% of the time I slave over a complicated meal for a significant other and finally serve it up, I find that I really have no interest in eating it, though it may be lovable indeed, and sometimes it revolts me.

Perhaps this is a sign that I should be a professional chef instead of a writer.

Yes, tasting while cooking takes the edge off your hunger that translates to your reduced desire. It's often why I enjoy eating someone else's efforts more than my own. I do get my enthusiasm back the next day when eating it as leftovers. Assuming there are leftovers.

It can also be an adrenaline let-down from the marathon cooking, thinking and pressures of entertaining.

Regards,

ParkerS wrote:Has anyone else been victim to that great spiritual depressant that is the instance of one's appetite for the food one cooks for others being nearly evaporated upon serving it to said others?

I would say that at least 50% of the time I slave over a complicated meal for a significant other and finally serve it up, I find that I really have no interest in eating it, though it may be lovable indeed, and sometimes it revolts me.

Perhaps this is a sign that I should be a professional chef instead of a writer.

this really is another possible thread:

yes

I, too, "suffer" this malaise

the s/o's come to expect it...

I cook often...but, having been immersed in the minutiae of the kitchen I routinely don't want any part of my product(and am happy when my guests or simply the s/o enjoys the results). I'll eat something else entirely when it's just the two of us.

I've come to expect that I will either regain my appetite after the "main event" or that I will enjoy my leftovers next day. I used to feel awkward explaining my "neurosis" to guests...but, I've come to accept that friends merely express concern: if I'm happy pecking at a portion of the spread I've prepared, but exhilarated by the conversation...the hanging out...then they oughtn't be shy about chowing down. Sometimes I'm wiped out from cooking. Sometimes I've been tasting away during the process. Either way I've learned to let it go...commes ci commes ca...

Oh wow! I'm not alone!!

I have always experienced this. Every Thanksgiving I"ve cooked has been such a let down that night -- I end up eating only a very small amount of the tasty food and long for the leftovers the next day.

Now...when I cook for myself that's never the issue. It's much more a relaxing thing -- I think I enhance my appetite when I cook for myself. Probably because I'm not so worried about everything turning out really well -- you know? Less stress equals bigger appetite!

Hi,

I took Christopher Gordon's suggestion to make this a separate topic. ParkerS - you are welcome the make-shift title for this thread.

It feels like group therapy time admitting our darkest secret: not enjoying the meal we put all our time and love into.

Regards,

For me it's a little different -- I don't have problems eating my own cooking, but if I've spent an entire weekend (or more) cooking up a storm for a party, by the time people arrive, the last thing I want to do is talk to them: I'm exhausted, drained, and just want to eat some good stuff and go to sleep.

A couple hours later I'm usually out of the funk, but there have been times I've been ready to shove people out the door as they're just arriving.

I am a severe sufferer of the same problem. In fact, it's directly related to the amount of effort I put into the meal.

When I throw something simple together: a sandwich, a simple one-pot meal, or a quick pan-fry, I can enjoy it rather easily.

When I work hard over a meal for hours or even days, I find myself completely un-interested in eating more than a bite or two of it. My appetite disappears as soon as I sit down at the table. It has nothing to do with whether or not the outcome is successful, and I do find the cooking process completely enjoyable.

The best explanation that I can muster is that my desire to eat something is linked to the psychological effort that I put into cooking it. That is, the more time I spend thinking about it, the less I'm interested in eating it.

The most recent example of this was a smoked Wagyu brisket that I tended to for the better part of a day (with a little help). It was not an intensive cooking effort (like, say, slaving over four bubbling pots on a stove), but it was an intensive psychological effort.

The outcome was quite good but I barely ate four bites.

Best,
Michael

Michael,

Did your interest rebound with the leftovers?

Regards,

Cathy2 wrote:Did your interest rebound with the leftovers?

Interesting that you ask. Yes it did. The next day, I ate a hearty dinner from the leftovers.

Perhaps after I can rest a little and divorce myself from the process, I can enjoy it more.

Best,
Michael

I get that way when I bake. Senior year of college, I would bake every Sunday and bring everything to school the next morning for my friends. Pound cake, cookies, brownies, tarts, etc...

I guess when you are looking at a pound of butter, eggs flour and sugar, you kinda lose your appetite... =) On the plus side, I lost a lot of weight that year!

For me a large component of this phenomena is the smell. Smelling something cooking for the first hour is intoxicating and mouth watering. By the second hour the feeling is starting to fade. By the third hour I want to chuck the dish and go to McDonald's.

These days I try to keep my meal plans fairly quick cooking. If something is going to take along time, I count on it to be a meal later in the week. It usually develops more flavor that way anyway.

-ramon

I share this feeling, but would add this. After cooking a complex item, the real pleasure comes from the first bite, and really no more is needed to feel fulfilled. At that point, you know your act of creation has been successful, and you can enjoy watching others consume. Whatever it is that dulls the appetite after a long day of cooking, I know this will happen, and yet it doesn't diminish the pleassure, which is the act of creation. Casual cooking is for making something delicious; complex cooking is more to see if you can do it.

Jonah

I find that, for myself, while exhaustion can kill my appetite, cooking doesn't. If, for example, I've been in transit for a few days and haven't had enough sleep for two or three nights, I can't eat, no matter how appealing the meal and even if someone else has prepared it. But if I'm reasonably rested, my biggest problem is not being unable to eat my cooking, but rather being too enthusiastic about the food. People tend to look at you funny if you say, "wow, this is great" about your own cooking! (Though they generally are more understanding if you explain that it's a new recipe.)

I do not share this particular problem, but my own variant - having cooked a meal, I become far too immersed in the details of serving it, and seeing to my "guests'" needs to be able to actually sit down and focus on the eating. And if I do actually focus on it, all I taste are the flaws (oh God, I undersalted this; did not brown it enough; the sauce is a lumpy disaster, etc.), so I can hardly be said to be enjoying the meal. In fact, I have had to learn to hold my tongue and never, ever, comment on my own cooking because I risk depriving everyone else of enjoying what I have prepared.

I have found a solution - if I can control the meal enough to get all the food ready and holding for a bit, then bring the party and meal to table more or less together, and start with a few (large) sips of good wine, I can distance myself sufficiently from the creation of the food, to enjoy the product (which is usually not half bad, if I do say so). The only downside is that once I have gone through this decompression process, I really want the Bride to take over all serving and am a bit resentful when I have to get up and do anything more. Needless to say, she has not bought into this divison of labor.

I have learned one thing over the years, though - I am not the only neurotic around.

This also happens to me when I cook for others. I lose my appetite and my taste buds go numb. If people like the food a lot I really can't indentify with them because to me it all tastes like nothing. And yes later on my taste buds return, along with my appetite.

The only time my taste buds keep working is if I've made dessert for everyone. For some reason I can always enjoy it with them.

Me, too!

I'm usually stuffed from tasting, and although cooking is a zen activity for me, for very large dinners like Thanksgiving or Christmas I do tend to get very tired - but I enjoy the process, and enjoy seeing other people eating what I prepared (and enjoy posting pictures) I often find myself enjoying only dessert, as it generally isn't something I've tasted much along the way.

Big meals always taste better the next day.

HI,

Like a lot of us, I put a lot of effort into a celebratory meal from planning, gathering of ingredients and the process of cooking it. I don't always enjoy the meal the day of, though I do get a second wind for leftovers later.

What I cannot fathom is when the guests arrived having already eaten somewhere else. Ate a token amount of food, then pushed the plate away explaining they just came from brunch.

If there can be a Jewish Christmas Eve, then why not a Jewish Easter, too?

Regards,

What a relief of a discussion! My wife never understands why (and maybe, until now, I didn't either) I take such care making the leftovers properly suited for the 'fridge after the big meal, which I haven't eaten much of. I really do enjoy the leftovers more, more often, than I enjoy the main. In fact, now that I think about it, I suspect that sometimes I choose to cook meals based on how much I desire the leftovers...

Another self-defeating process is cooking a 'simple' lunch for myself, alone. Five minutes into the process, I've complicated the recipe or courses to the point where I'm angry and frustrated at myself for not being able to leave it alone: why can't I just boil the damn noodles, throw some soy and green onions and chicken stock on them and leave it be?

Sheesh.

Geo

I get the same way. But not with baked goods. If I go to the trouble of making a meal, especially one with a lot of courses or one that just took a long time and a lot of effort, I'm not that interested in taking the effort to eat it. Plus, once I sink my teeth into it, I realize that all that planning, prepping, cooking and serving amounted to a meal that was ultimately less than the sum of its parts. Thus I've resorted to going cheap and simple, and if I cook on holidays a lot of it is pared down and/or reheated from frozen stages.