Hi my name is Craig and I'll be your waiter (and accountant)

A true story: I get the check at a mid-range restaurant. While I've come to accept (barely) a smiley-face doodle, a loopy-lettered "thank you," and the server's name handwritten on the bill, here now was a jotting I had never before seen.

At the bottom of the check, adjacent to the total and tip line but not directly on it, "Craig" had written helpfully: "A 20% tip would equal $23.91."

Aghast, all I could think were the words to the immortal question: are you f***ing kidding me?

Olde-

Between this post and your post about being seated in the armpit of a restaurant, I can see why you used up all your sick days and are now calling in dead.

aschie30:

Yes, I'm one put-upon guy.

I would have wrote a note saying that a 10% tip was $11.96, left that and been on my way. That's a really arrogant thing to do. I wonder if his manager/boss knows what he is doing.

Now am I curious what the answer is to another question - Can it hurt to ask?

What tip did you leave? I would like to think that the tip would be based on the service and experience, so that little exercise in tipping for dummies would not mean much, but I also know I am ornery enough to not want to be told how much to tip. Even if he deserved 25%, he moved the ceiling down to 18% for me.

Seems to me I have run into some credit card programs that also give you tip amounts for a range, say 10% through 25%. When we get the tableside charge terminals that they use in Europe, some will allow you to enter a percentage in for the tip. None of those things strike me as offensive, while Craig's gesture does feel insulting in a couple of ways.

Funny how that works.

Dickson:

I think I left $15, which on the tab amount, would be my barest of minimums (short of a complete stiffing).

I have been back to the restaurant three times since, and this dipsh*t has been there on each occasion. And each time, I have pointed him out to the hostess and said I will sit in anyone's station but his. This request has always been honored graciously, but what's interesting is that I have never been asked why (perhaps it's thought there may some apart-from-the-restaurant animus involved).

Maybe next time I'm there I'll ask the hostess if she would like to know why.

i would've left him a note on the back of the check:

"Craig, don't calculate this out and write it down. Work for your 20% tip, don't ask for it. Here's 5% because i've been in your shoes - but otherwise you would've gotten nothing for a presumptuous gesture."

If that kind of note doesn't drive it home then he's just never gonna get it. I would have a really, really hard time giving 5% tip on a check that had that note on it.

Wow.
Maybe it's me, but I don't get all of the harshness here. Is it possible that the server was simply trying to make your life easier by throwing out a standard number (there was nothing there that said ("Please tip this amount") and not EXPECTING that you tip 20%?

Question number two to Olde: would you have tipped 20% if the note was not written?

Why is the offense taken? I don't get it. I am usually far more blunt than others, and do not tend to tiptoe around subjects. I tip how I see appropriate, and it is usually more than others expect, but I tip for the service provided. If that server did a less than acceptable job, I would not feel bad at all to express that in the tip. What the server wrote on the check would have absolutely no effect on my feelings at all.


Now, if the server had been obviously an absolute d-bag, and did nothing to provide any sort of service, but expected a 20.00 handout, then I guess that would be a different story.

"Aghast" and "are you f***ing kidding me" just seem REALLY harsh to me.

I don't mind when those suggestions are auto-printed on the receipt (I sometimes see something like):

tip guide*
15% - $30.00
18% - $36.00
20% - $40.00

But hand-written is just asking for trouble.

*sometimes these take the final line item including tax and other captain / service charges as their launching point

I find it actually helpful when the credit card machine tells me what the tip could be at different levels, but I have to admit that this just has the same kind of naked feel of greed as that advice-column perennial, the bossy bride-to-be whose wedding invitation comes with something like a minimum gift amount stated, the savings account number to which it should be deposited, and an all-caps notice that guests failing to meet the minimum will not be admitted to the service. In my ideal world, the tip should be a pleasant surprise, greeted by "Oh, you shouldn't have!" It is after all an archaic remnant of a day when the diner was of considerably higher social station than the mere server, and tossing a few shillings of favor at the ragged urchin or buxom wench who served you was intended, as much as anything, to demonstrate the difference between them and yourself. Anything that makes it more of a routine contractual and mathematical obligation between two equal parties makes one wonder why such an undemocratic practice survives at all.

seebee wrote:Wow.
Maybe it's me, but I don't get all of the harshness here. Is it possible that the server was simply trying to make your life easier by throwing out a standard number (there was nothing there that said ("Please tip this amount") and not EXPECTING that you tip 20%?

Question number two to Olde: would you have tipped 20% if the note was not written?

Why is the offense taken? I don't get it. I am usually far more blunt than others, and do not tend to tiptoe around subjects. I tip how I see appropriate, and it is usually more than others expect, but I tip for the service provided. If that server did a less than acceptable job, I would not feel bad at all to express that in the tip. What the server wrote on the check would have absolutely no effect on my feelings at all.

I think it's just you, seebee (though I'm sure somebody else will jump in and prove me wrong). I personally wouldn't let it affect what I was otherwise planning on tipping, but that note says one of two things (or both):

1) For a payment that is supposed to be a reflection of my performance and valued at your discretion, you should give me 20%. But it would be out of place for me to just say it, so instead I'm going to tell you how much 20% is *wink, wink*.

2) You're not smart enough to move the decimal point and double.

The first is arrogant and presumptuous. The second is condescending and rude. Neither are good.

seebee wrote: "Aghast" and "are you f***ing kidding me" just seem REALLY harsh to me.

I actually agree with your assessment of my reaction, though understand I'm making the point purely in relative terms.

But I don't agree that Craig's handiwork was harmless. Better that he should give 15%/18%/20% calculations, which would at least convey the (thin) veneer of helpfulness and customer choice.

I did not mention that the service he provided throughout the meal was decidedly lame, since I wanted to focus the story on his creativity with my check. He completely forgot two items, disappeared for long stretches, and never once came by to do a courtesy check on the table. He was headed for 15% no matter what.

In his defense (kind of): This is a restaurant in a mall in a touristy area. I can't prove it, but I would bet the restaurant receives more than its fair share of really bad customers--the morons who don't understand or don't want to understand the whole tipping thing, and literally leave nothing or a few paltry dollars. So I get why this prompting mechanism might be employed. Still, I don't like it, and it's especially galling when a guy like Craig isn't earning it--or at least in my case wasn't.

Olde School wrote:In his defense (kind of): This is a restaurant in a mall in a touristy area. I can't prove it, but I would bet the restaurant receives more than its fair share of really bad customers--the morons who don't understand or don't want to understand the whole tipping thing, and literally leave nothing or a few paltry dollars. So I get why this prompting mechanism might be employed. Still, I don't like it, and it's especially galling when a guy like Craig isn't earning it--or at least in my case wasn't.

Alternatively, he could be used to dealing with international tourists who aren't familiar with US tipping practices.

Olde School wrote:In his defense (kind of): This is a restaurant in a mall in a touristy area. I can't prove it, but I would bet the restaurant receives more than its fair share of really bad customers--the morons who don't understand or don't want to understand the whole tipping thing, and literally leave nothing or a few paltry dollars. So I get why this prompting mechanism might be employed. Still, I don't like it, and it's especially galling when a guy like Craig isn't earning it--or at least in my case wasn't.

The idea being that somebody who was planning on tipping a few bucks would see that note and think, "Oh, gosh, I'd better leave $25"? Somehow I don't see that happening

jesteinf wrote: Alternatively, he could be used to dealing with international tourists who aren't familiar with US tipping practices.

Great point, hadn't thought of the possibility. However, in my subsequent visits, no other servers "pulled a Craig."

Hi,

On the flip side of coin, aka as a Stupid Cathy trick, I did the following: I went to a restaurant where the bill was roughly $80. I added a $16 tip, then advised everyone to pony up $16 each. The money piled up, I didn't count it (which would have revealed my error) and handed it to the waitress. We probably talked for another 10-15 minutes before clearing out.

Drove away from the restaurant with a happy recollection of the meal and conversation. One of my passengers asked to stop by an ATM machine to collect money to reimburse me. I recalled agreeing to lend her money, but couldn't recall giving it to her. I asked when did I give her the money, she replied she thought I had paid the waitress. The horrible realization was we (actually me) shorted the waitress by $16, which was her tip.

I went back the following morning for breakfast at the very same restaurant. Our waitress from the day before was sitting at a table rolling up silverware into a napkin. I went straight to her table with her tip from the day before. I apologized profusely, explained my error and assured her the fault was completely mine.

Having heard of restaurant employees making a scene when they felt slighted by customers or the possibility this underpayment could have easily gone unrecognized. I'm glad for the good nature of the waitress involved and this error was caught.

Regards,

Dmnkly wrote:I think it's just you, seebee (though I'm sure somebody else will jump in and prove me wrong). I personally wouldn't let it affect what I was otherwise planning on tipping, but that note says one of two things (or both):

1) For a payment that is supposed to be a reflection of my performance and valued at your discretion, you should give me 20%. But it would be out of place for me to just say it, so instead I'm going to tell you how much 20% is *wink, wink*.

2) You're not smart enough to move the decimal point and double.

The first is arrogant and presumptuous. The second is condescending and rude. Neither are good.

I'm still a little hazy on this. Some say it's ok if it is a computer generated note???

I think there is still a chance that the server was trying to make life easier on the patron by throwing out a "standard" tip amount for good service, and it is still up to the patron to tip more or less (as usual.) Just as is perceived by the computer generated note.


Here's something for thought:
What if it is the server's discretion on what parties' bills the computer generated notes get added to? Same general snottiness, but some would deem that acceptable?

seebee wrote:I think there is still a chance that the server was trying to make life easier on the patron by throwing out a "standard" tip amount for good service, and it is still up to the patron to tip more or less (as usual.)

Agreed. It's possible, in which case you can disregard anything I said. But I don't buy it. And the difference between this and a computer generated note is intent. A computer generated note that includes multiple amounts, including some that are more difficult to calculate in your head, is obviously meant to be helpful. A handwritten note that has only one percentage -- one of the easiest to calculate, no less -- is almost certainly a suggestion of what the server feels he should be tipped. I'm not saying I'm appalled, but at the very least it's really tacky.

seebee wrote:I think there is still a chance that the server was trying to make life easier on the patron by throwing out a "standard" tip amount for good service, and it is still up to the patron to tip more or less (as usual.) Just as is perceived by the computer generated note.

Yes, but unfortunately, etiquette in our society (the rules by which we can get along), is based upon perception, not possibilities. I've got another "P" word for Craig's stunt: Presumptuous. While it's possible that Craig was attempting to be helpful (anything is possible, after all), the perception of his actions was that he was presuming that you would tip 20% (5% above what is considered still to be the minimum for a good tip).

Now, if he is making this tipping recommendation to unsuspecting foreign tourists, knowing from experience that they are unaware of the appropriate custom, his behavior has then crosses into unscrupulous territory.

As someone said above, if he wanted to be helpful, then a scale would be more apt.

This discussion reminds me of some graffiti I saw a few years ago. I was in Victoria, British Columbia, a town known for being a tourist destination. On a wall, in huge red letters, was scrawled, "Tipping is 15-20%." It seemed to me a poignant cry of anguish by a fed up member of the service sector.

(Craig's note doesn't have the same poignancy.)

Perhaps Craig could use his "go-getterness" to reprogram the computer to have the checks print out "18% gratuity added for all parties of 5 or more, 20% gratuity added for all parties served by Craig".

For a handwritten notice like that, the percentage offered makes it more problematic. 20% is the new 15%, i.e. it's now the default for a lot of people, but it is still a nice tip. In effect, "Craig" looks like he's demanding something extra. On the other hand, if he asked for 15% he'd be asking for less than a lot of people are prepared to give. And I don't think even he would be brazen enough to suggest 25%. So he can't win.

The real problem I have with that sort of suggestion is that I enjoy feeling like I'm making a choice when I tip well. I don't really feel like it's an option not to; I actually think the whole tipping system is a pain, BUT I do like it that when I leave a good 20% on the bill including wine, it is usually taken as a recognition of good service and a sincere "thank you" from me. It's the one redeeming factor of an irritating system IMO. Something like what "Craig" did would take away from that, for me.

Olde School, was it 20% on the pre- or post-tax bill?

Darren72 wrote:Olde School, was it 20% on the pre- or post-tax bill?

haha, that'd make it even better if the waiter was figuring that out post-tax on top of all of it.

Darren72 wrote:Olde School, was it 20% on the pre- or post-tax bill?

Post.

And the added absurdity is that his tip calculation was to the penny. This was more evidence to me that he wasn't being helpful, but predatory. After all, wouldn't a helpful suggestion be rounded?

bibi rose wrote:20% is the new 15%

It does seem to be getting there, but I'm wondering why. As the price of meals goes up, so does the standard 15 percent, so servers automatically get more money.

Traditionally, the higher amount in the 15-20 percent range was for fancier places where the tip was likely to be divvied among more people.

I understand the increase in flat-fee tips but not percentage tips. Does anyone have a clue where this came from, besides the proliferation of Craiglike behavior (including media reports quoting servers saying that they think 15-percent tippers are cheapskates)?

My theory for the inflation of routine tips to 20 percent is that it's easier to calculate and Americans are losing their ability to do math in their heads.

But they can still sort out the pre- and post-tax totals on a check and for anyone to suggest that 20 percent post tax is a standard tip is absurd.

LAZ wrote:My theory for the inflation of routine tips to 20 percent is that it's easier to calculate and Americans are losing their ability to do math in their heads.

I think it's that the restaurant-going class is, by and large, wealthier than it was thirty years ago in real terms, and so able to dispense 20% tips relatively painlessly.

Olde School wrote:At the bottom of the check, adjacent to the total and tip line but not directly on it, "Craig" had written helpfully: "A 20% tip would equal $23.91."

Was that the actual amount? I am no math expert, but I am sure a 20% tip will always produce an even number.

d4v3 wrote:

Olde School wrote:At the bottom of the check, adjacent to the total and tip line but not directly on it, "Craig" had written helpfully: "A 20% tip would equal $23.91."

Was that the actual amount? I am no math expert, but I am sure a 20% tip will always produce an even number.

$23.91 is exactly 20% of $119.55... stick to food

(Would I be correct in guessing that the source of the error was the thought that you frequently get to 20% by doubling 10%, thinking that doubling any dollar amount will produce an even number, but forgetting that dividing by ten may produce fractional cents?)

Dmnkly wrote:$21.91 is exactly 20% of $119.55... stick to food

So it is. I forgot that .2 x .05 will give you a penny. 20% will always result in an even number or a number ending in 1.