Andies (uptown)--Middle Eastern conflict

Through no fault of our own (except , perhaps, in another life) we ended up eating a lunch at the Andies on Montrose that depressingly confirmed our judgment of years ago, when, after several sub-mediocre visits to the new space on Clark St., we finally gave up this old fav. for lost.

As a result of several plans not going our way on the Sun. morning in question, we ended up cold and hungry at Clark and Montrose. The boy needed food urgently, so we opted for Andies on the theory that we ought to at least be able to get an acceptable light lunch, if nothing special.
What we encountered was an operation so utterly listless that one wondered how the building itself kept from simply relapsing into a pile of rubble.

At first things seemed, if not promising, passable. The old house occupied by the restaurant offers a spacious, well-lit room. We were seated immediately among 2 or 3 other tables. We got water and menus, including a children’s menu.

Our son is a standard-issue picky 6-year old, but he does love most variations on chicken soup, and the kids’ menu offered “chicken and rice soup.” Alas, this turned out to be the “avgolemono” of the regular menu under a deracinated title. When a 6 yr. old orders chicken soup, he expects broth with discernible noodles or rice etc. floating in it. He is definitely not expecting something the consistency of porridge that tastes like lemons. I can’t imagine why, if they call it avgolemono on one menu, they re-name it for the kids menu.

So, I ate the cup of soup---it was all right, though not special---and we attempted to order again. Chicken tenders and fries. To their credit, the chicken was not breaded, but nicely seasoned white meat, and quite tasty. The fries were nicely golden cottage-style fries, but of a flavorless, formerly frozen variety that were cottony mush on the inside.

Mom and dad ordered babaganouj, 2 salads, and calamari.

As we waited for food to arrive we watched with increasing trepidation a series of unfortunate events unfolding around us. Dishes were being cleared by a pale, gangly, youth whose mien, nay whose entire being seemed to express a combination of low-grade panic and weary resignation held in perfect, melancholy suspension. He looked for all the world like the poor, doomed, “cream-faced loon” who is the only one remaining to attend Macbeth in Act V, as fate closes in.

His black trousers, far too long, and “a world too wide” for his narrow frame were unappetizingly soiled, as was the formerly white polo shirt which was having trouble staying tucked into them. When he wasn’t clearing plates, he occupied himself leaning against a wall, surveying the room, idly and unselfconsciously picking his nose.

Our waiter was neat and professional, but his professionalism could do nothing to allay whatever afflicted the kitchen. As at the sister restaurant in Andersonville, there was a brunch menu with various incongruous brunchy omelets and crepes. He arrived at the table behind us to ask how everything was, and was informed that the eggs over lightly he had delivered were not even remotely over lightly. He manfully took responsibility on behalf of the house and apologized for the error, but then added that the problem had probably occurred because the kitchen was not used to the phrase “over lightly,” They’re used to “over easy.”

Nu? So no one asked? No one attempted to clarify this yawning ambiguity? Whatever.
Some 10 min. or more after putting in our order, the waiter arrives to say that the last order of calamari just went out. We need to start over. Fine. We’ll try the kibbie.

Food arrives.
 The baba is good enough—creamier than I prefer, but with a nice smoky flavor. Garnished with a single, small olive. The pita is warm and fresh and just a little oily. So far good enough.
 My salad arrives. It is undressed. Request dressing. Out comes a ramekin with the worst possible form of bad diner “Greek” dressing, i.e. red vinegar, sugar, and a sludge of dried oregano.
The salad itself is extraordinarily sad: greens, a single sliver each of red and green pepper, another small olive, a strip of thoroughly undistinguished “feta” cheese, some onion
 Kibbie: Arrives looking promising. Evenly golden globes, with a just-fried-still-hot glisten to them. Alas, they taste like knishes teleported to another galaxy and reassembled by aliens. Mushy and flavorless, including the ground lamb filling.

As I toy with my food I watch the busboy visiting the pretty hostess at the front where she demonstrates something to him by playing with her hair at length in front of the large mirror beside the entryway.

For an operation with an undeniably--if inexplicably-- successful sister and many years behind it to offer a meal and service reminiscent of an old age home whose license is in danger just boggled my mind.

Andies Restaurant
1467 W. Montrose

Went to the Montrose Andies once around 10 years ago and wrote it off as a hell-hole. How it could still be open is beyond me. For that matter the one in Andersonville is nothing to bother with-Andies was best in the old days when it was a gyros joint with extras.

My wife and I had a similiarly underwhelming experience at the Andies on Clark several months ago (so underwhelming that I really can't recall what either of us ate, although there was definitely chicken with a faintly - emphasis on faint - lemony taste in one of the dishes).

What did stand out, however, was the outstandingly poor service. Ordinarily, when a server is clearly new to the profession and still getting the hang of what can be a very difficult job, we find it endearing rather than annoying. After all, we've all had first jobs of some kind and can relate to the awkward feeling of never quite knowing what you're doing.

This meal quickly progressed beyond that however. After taking an extrodinarly long time to come take our orders, almost spilling the plates (again, something we were quite forgiving of), and forgetting our order of pita, the waitress simply vanished. We finished our meals, waited for refills on drinks, waited for our check, just waited, stretching what was supposed to be a quick dinner into a marathon.

It became clear after finally fetching another waiter from the hostess stand that (1) the rest of the staff had no idea where our waitress went, leading us to belief that she decided then and there that waitressing wasn't for her and quit and (2) they didn't really care that no one had looked in on our table in 45 minutes, but were pretty annoyed that they would have to stop talking and help us out. All of this occured, of course, when the restaurant was only about 1/4 full.

All in all, I sensed a real lack of professionalism and caring on the part of the staff (and not just the poor waitress who walked off the job). I would have to say, it was one of the worst service experiences I've had at a restaurant, topped only by the time in New Orleans when our waiter got arrested.

mrbarolo wrote:As we waited for food to arrive we watched with increasing trepidation a series of unfortunate events unfolding around us. Dishes were being cleared by a pale, gangly, youth whose mien, nay whose entire being seemed to express a combination of low-grade panic and weary resignation held in perfect, melancholy suspension. He looked for all the world like the poor, doomed, “cream-faced loon” who is the only one remaining to attend Macbeth in Act V, as fate closes in.

His black trousers, far too long, and “a world too wide” for his narrow frame were unappetizingly soiled, as was the formerly white polo shirt which was having trouble staying tucked into them. When he wasn’t clearing plates, he occupied himself leaning against a wall, surveying the room, idly and unselfconsciously picking his nose.

What a wonderful description...

A

Fantastic review, mrbarolo!

I've had some decent results at Andie's on Clark. They have a really great curried chicken couscous dish, and I quite like the dip sampler (hummus, baba ghanouj, harissa, and patata). I don't care for their aesthetic, but I enjoy the food more than Reza's next door.

The Montrose location is inexplicable. It has always felt like a desolate cave.

For me, the Clark location is a you-can't-go-home-again story of inevitable change and loss.

The pre-expansion place was one of our favorites--tables jammed together, glasses fogging over with savory steam in the winter, intense flavors and no misses across a simple, wonderful menu. Then came the new place and while I regretted the loss of the old places ambience, I thought, they've earned some more space to work in and more tables to turn.

Then we went.

The big menu was filled with bland yuppie concoctions involving pasta and portabello mushrooms, and eggy brunches with bloody marys (not to mention Glogg in the winter fer crissakes!). As The Pretenders said, "my city was gone."

We tried picking our way through the menu minefield to find the old favorites. On our first visit we received a dish of hummos that was sweet. Sweet like cream cheese cake frosting. Our eyes bugged out and we figured that someone had mistaken sugar for salt in the kitchen. We explained our problem to the waiter who brought it back to the kitchen and then returned it to us saying that the kitchen had pronounced it ok. That was how it was supposed to be; maybe we just weren't used to it.

Nothing else was eye-poppingly weird, nor was it better than just OK. One or 2 more visits failed to show any improvement. It might as well be Charlie's Ale House with eggplant.

REZAS
Though I know I'm in the minority on this point, I actually enjoy Rezas. I think they know how to grill things. Meat, fish, etc., always seem to come off the broiler to a turn. Obviously there's nothing exotic, but I do love several of their apps., (it's been a while, but something involving potatos and something else involving mushrooms always gets ordered and makes me happy). Also, I've never had bad service, no matter how busy they were. It's not a destination place, but I can take my parents there, or a large group, and it's reliably better than just OK. As well as a good value/portion ratio.

As it happens, I decided to give Andies' new location a try just last week, as I remembered having had some good veggie platters at the old Clark St. spot. What resulted was the poorest restaurant experience I have had in quite some time. The egg-lemon soup had a stale flavor that suggested it had been uncovered in the fridge way too long. Not merely bad, it was inedible. In spite of my Minnesota upbringing, I sent it back. The waiter was gracious and apologetic, but the falafel sandwich came accompanied by a pile of uniformly slimy, blackened mesclun. Clearly, no one had even looked at these greens before sending them out to be served. Then came a first for me-- sending back two courses in a row. I ate the mediocre (I am being charitable) felafel but shuddered to think of the dessert offered as recompense, so I refused it, paid, and felt slightly sorry for the waiter as I left. As I exited, I saw a man working hard on holiday decorations, which seemed sad, all in all.

I just have to chime in and say that the Andies on Clark is working on full cylinders lately. I live in the neighborhood and have been going to Andies since I was a kid (way before the expansion of Andies and the neighborhood in general). I did feel like it wasn't up to par during the early part of the summer but lately has been kicking out some tasty meals. I had the schawerma with cous-cous yesterday and it was very flavorful. The hummous had a nice balance to it. (I wish I had the talent of some people on the board to describe meals. I feel like a third grader sometimes - 'it was good. It tasted yummy. don't eat crayons'). The service was attentive although I do hate the writing of the names on the table. The owner, Andie, was walking around the restaurant. Lately it seems that he has been around more. I think that is why the place has been better. Anyways, in my humble opinion, I think that the majority of the Andies menu is done well especially on those that stick with the Middle Eastern cusine. It's a good, solid, reasonably priced neighborhood place in an area that is getting increasingly frou-frou and fancied up. I think they are trying to compete with that and hopefully that won't be their down fall.

Andies, when only Andie was behind the grill and made your food himself, was likely the best everyday sort of place one could ever hope for in a neighborhood. The soup was stunning and all the meals well prepared and tremendous value. I was under the impression Andies sold or was forced out of the Andersonville location by sleazy partners hoping to capitalize on his success. So that when it became Mediteranean Disneyland, this was under the new management who wanted to just undersell Reza's next door. I have had such snooty yet incompetant service there it is hearbreaking to go back.

As for the Montrose location, I think this is all that Andie and his much older brother had left when they got bought out. I heard the older brother passed away and Andie had lost his focus for a time and the place was going downhill. Even in the days of the $4 veggie combo, or the giant $S greakburger, Montrose always felt like a banquet hall that was in between weddings. They ought to downsize back the original concept; I still have fond personal feelings for Andie and wish him only the best.