That's really too bad. I've only eaten at Merlo-Lincoln once, but it was excellent, and, come to think of it, marred very slightly by the service. Overall, my impressions were that the whole feel of the place was very, very Italian. The coziness, the fact that the bartender and some patrons were actually conversing in Italian, the menu, etc.
The spell was somewhat broken when our waiter unloaded one of those, "So, have you ever dined with us before?" openings, as if ordering dinner at an Italian restaurant was one of those exotic experiences that required a pre-qualifying tutorial. And I had to find a non-pissy way of saying that while I hadn't actually eaten in this very establishment, I felt I was up to the task.
The food that follows was very, very good, including house-made pasta that was correctly cooked and a rabbit ragu.
There was nothing in the service as absolutely outrageous as the OP described.
"Strange how potent cheap music is."