Smoking or non-smoking? Waiters that is....

We went out dinner last night to a 3 or 4 start restaurant and while the food and setting were great, the smell of smoke (and mints) on our server took the perfectness of the evening away. Maybe I'm being too picky about this but it really bothered me. I can't think of anything I could have said or done that would have changed the situation without being rude. What would you do in this kind of situation?

Spray down the waiter with Febreeze.

It's no different than another diner in the house wearing too much perfume or cologne. It really sucks but I don't think there's much you can do about it.

I suppose that a polite letter to the restaurant might help. If it's a situation about which they are not aware, perhaps they'd like to know about it and address it. If they consider it outside their range of control, they'd probalby let you know that in a reply.

=R=

i wouldn't say anything... i do think that is being too picky; just my opinion though

ronnie_suburban wrote:It's no different than another diner in the house wearing too much perfume or cologne. It really sucks but I don't think there's much you can do about it.

Yup. Both give me very quick and violent headaches. I wouldn't tolerate it when restaurants were allowed to have smoking sections, and I certainly don't now that I'm free to breathe wherever I go.

I'd let the management know. IMO, people can learn to smoke without absolutely reeking of it.There are tricks for aiming the smoke to avoid getting it all over your clothes and hair. (Plus, of course, washing your clothes more often.) And you don't just cover the smell with mints, you rinse your mouth. I have a co-worker who smokes and I would never know if he didn't go out for cigarette breaks.

Ditto...although for me it depends on the type of restaurant. If I were a Chef, I'd not want my front of house staff to wear anything that interacts with customers taste buds. Strongly fragranced anything (perfume, hairspray, cigarette smoke...) interferes with ones ability to smell and therefore taste ones food. If I managed a "nice" restaurant, I'd want to know that my employees reeked.

As a patron, I might ask for another server. I really, really, hate cigarette smoke and have been known to change lanes when driving because the person in the car ahead of me is smoking and I can smell it.

I, being a bit brash at times, never wait to complain. I figure that by the time my phone call or letter gets to management, there isn't much they can do to correct the situation. I politely complain right then and there so that the situation can be addressed while I'm still around to benefit from it.

If I were in an extremely casual place, diner-like or order at the counter-ish, I might just suck it up.

dadgummit, i gotta de-lurk for this topic...

when it comes to 'smoke'...does the lingering odor of barbeque, char grilled meats, fireplace nights or, if you can remember, autumn burning leaves offend you equally?


it's a big, big world, but you are only a very small part of it....

evry thing smells - get over your anti-tobacco hysteria.

arkay wrote:dadgummit, i gotta de-lurk for this topic...

when it comes to 'smoke'...does the lingering odor of barbeque, char grilled meats, fireplace nights or, if you can remember, autumn burning leaves offend you equally?


it's a big, big world, but you are only a very small part of it....

evry thing smells - get over your anti-tobacco hysteria.

Wow, what a way to de-lurk!
First off, welcome to the board
I hope you post here often.



Yes it is a big world and there are lots and lots of restaurants interested in having paying customers return not only for the taste of the food but for the total experience. FWIW, I feel that the distraction of tobacco smoke mixed with mints to be an annoyance that I'm not willing to "get over" All the while, I have not decided if contacting the management would be the way for me to go on this issue.

As to some of your comments about me being hysterical all I can say is we've not met and I'm not sure how you could judge me that way from my posts on this thread. I hope that you understand that I'm not judging you by your first post here...

Have a nice day!

dadgummit, i gotta de-lurk for this topic...

when it comes to 'smoke'...does the lingering odor of barbeque, char grilled meats, fireplace nights or, if you can remember, autumn burning leaves offend you equally?


it's a big, big world, but you are only a very small part of it....

evry thing smells - get over your anti-tobacco hysteria.

That's totally different. I don't smoke, and although I don't like the smell, I can tolerate it a little more than some folks (no offense meant by that).

Fireplaces don't blow smoke in your direction, but up through a chimney. BBQs etc. smoke food, but not many people outside the circus eat cigs. I'm guessing that if folks can't stand the scent of BBQs they generally choose not to go to Smoque (pun intended).

I'm not judging either. Just sayin'.

Diannie wrote:If I were in an extremely casual place, diner-like or order at the counter-ish, I might just suck it up.

I think this is the key. The expectations vary, depending on the level of the place. But regardless, if an issue like this doesn't matter to the person in charge of the restaurant, then it's pretty much a case of "love it or leave it" for the diner.

And I think that whether this bothers you or not, comparing cigarette smoke aroma masked by mint to bbq smoke or burning leaves is off the mark.

=R=

this topic was started on subject of lingering odor....

not blowing smoke.

granted.... tobacco odor and mints may offend your sensibilities as patchoulie oil does mine.

is this an issue with management that a serious adult would really press"?

in this delicate culture of ours, the answer is obviously yes, by some.


an aside to ronnie... we're not talking burning tires here - tobacco smoke does indeed, smell good, to some.

arkay wrote:is this an issue with management that a serious adult would really press"?

in this delicate culture of ours, the answer is obviously yes, by some.

How about you quit with the ad hominem arguments.

What bothers one person, doesn't bother another. I have never smoked. And yet, I have never minded being in the presence of smokers! Let alone been able to detect when someone in my presence had previously smoked, unless I was kissing that person. And I have a fine sense of smell.

So, in my opinion, a manager hearing a complaint about a waiter who smelled to a customer like cigarette smoke would probably say, "Well, that customer didn't like the smell of that waiter." It wouldn't necessarily mean to him that all customers, or even most customers, would find the waiter offensive. I would expect the manager to be respectful and apologetic to the customer who complained (in the sense of, "I'm sorry you had a bad experience; if you return, I'll make sure you get a different waiter, and allow me to buy you a round of cocktails at that time as well") but I wouldn't necessarily expect (or wish) the manager to discipline the waiter or demand a change of lifestyle from him.

arkay wrote:an aside to ronnie... we're not talking burning tires here - tobacco smoke does indeed, smell good, to some.

Well, that's why I think that a polite letter to the restaurant might not be a bad thing. If the chef is someone who doesn't want these things (cigarettes, cologne, perfume, etc.) interfering with his food, then it may be worth bringing it to his/her attention. Perhaps there's already a policy in place that isn't being adhered to by the server. In that case, perhaps the letter could produce assurance from the restaurant that it was not likely to occur again. If chef/restaurant doesn't care at all, then that's decent information for a diner to have when considering another visit.

I personally wouldn't have a problem with this if it happened at a diner or casual spot but if I'm paying $100-$400 per person on a meal, I'd be bummed out if everytime a server showed up at the table, a distracting aroma followed (cigarette, cologne, perfurme, stinky shampoo, etc.).

But I also think you were way too harsh on the OP, who asked a genuine and reasonable question, without getting judgmental about it at all. Can you please reciprocate?

Thanks,

=R=

Tobacco and burning paper has a smell that's quite a bit different from smoldering oak or cherry or even leaves. I don't think they really compare.

arkay wrote:this topic was started on subject of lingering odor....

not blowing smoke.

granted.... tobacco odor and mints may offend your sensibilities as patchoulie oil does mine.

is this an issue with management that a serious adult would really press"?

in this delicate culture of ours, the answer is obviously yes, by some.


an aside to ronnie... we're not talking burning tires here - tobacco smoke does indeed, smell good, to some.

Couldn't agree more. The entire smoking sensitivity is completely absurd... And is reflexively supported by people despite hypocrisy regarding all other smells and irritants.

It's already killed one of life's truest pleaures, having a cigarette while at a bar, drinking a beer, listening to music... yet people still complain about smoke on someones clothes?

Oh boy...

Hitler reference in 5...4...3...2....

jesteinf wrote:Oh boy...

Hitler reference in 5...4...3...2....

im glad im alone at work, I just laughed my butt off.

Folks, this thread is not about smoking. It's about a diner encountering something that he found unpleasant in a restaurant and wondering whether there was anything to be done about it. Please, let's keep the discussion focused on the issue brought up by the OP and stop with the personal attacks, or we'll have no choice but to lock the thread.

Thanks,

=R=
for the moderators

I guess I have been lucky, and never experienced a waiter reeking of cigarette smoke, perfume, or even b.o.. If I did I wouldnt mention it to the manager, I would just put the restaurant on my do not return list.

I think you should contact the management if it bothered you, particularly if this was a higher end restaurant. I look at it as akin to a server having wrinkled clothes, an untucked shirt, or something of that nature -- a sign of a lack of professionalism. Does it take away from the food? Probably not, unless you have a really sensitive nose. Does it take away from the overall atmosphere and fine dining experience? Sure, to some. This is speculative, but if the odor was so strong and the server was looking to cover it up with mints, there is perhaps a decent chance that the server went out for a smoke break at some point on his shift. That to me, should not be happening at a finer dining establishment.

I do think there is a distinction to be made between the situation where another diner has on too much perfume (as in ronnie's example way upthread) or is wearing patchouli or something. In that case, there is nothing management can politely do. With an employee, however, management can (and perhaps should, at some establishments) set some ground rules for servers -- including no smoke breaks at work, please do not smoke in your uniform/work clothes immediately before work, and/or go stand next to the fryer for 5 minutes prior to returning to the floor if you have violated either of the foregoing.

Matt wrote:wrinkled clothes, an untucked shirt, or something of that nature

Oh, if I see that, I'm so out the door.....

I would have no problem with notifying the management of this issue. I think restaurants - especially high end ones - ought to strive to eliminate all strong non-food odors from the dining room. I've mentioned problems related to this on a number of occasions to restaurant managers and chefs. At Spring, I suggested that they replace the beautiful but powerful-smelling flowers in the dining room. At Piece, I told them that every time the kitchen door swung open, I could smell wafting trash aroma from the dumpster out back. At a restaurant I won't name, I informed the manager about a busboy who ruined my dining experience everytime his armpit crossed my face as he retrieved some dirty plates. As noted upthread, there are ways to smoke without bringing the smell with you into the dining room.

i stick with my original opinion: just let it go... there are more pressing matters, like the size of the portions

as for the smell of smoke being compared to the smoke from bbq woods... some smoke does smell good. i know of nonsmokers that can enjoy the smell of a good cigar and even that green stuff smells good to some.

Mmmm...I love the smell of cooked spinach!

I agree completely that a waiter that smells as if they just smoked is rude, distracting, and unacceptable. I personally wouldn't say anything just because I don't like to 'complain' unless it ruined the meal. If it was that off-putting I'd gladly address a manager and kindly ask for another waiter.

At work everyone eats at the same tables and I've often left those tables because one or more cooks have smelled horribly of smoke. Yes it is offensive and no it shouldn't have to be tolerated. If I smelled like BO someone would say something about it and I'd have to go home and shower...there should be no difference in that and smoking. If it affects someone in a negative way it is a negative thing. I can't stand the excessive cologne users, the smokers that can't contain, and any other person that causes a controllable inconvenience.

You shouldn't have to go out of your way to get away from these things, sure it's a big world and I'm a small part of it but like anything else I shouldn't have to put up with crap that can be controlled. Rant over.

Ohh...and I agree 120% with the smoking ban and think it's maybe the single greatest thing that's happened in Chicago in a long time.

the smoking ban has been horrible for business, regardless of what the antismoking lobby states. casino revenue is down 20% and late night establishments, mostly coffee serving diners, have seen a drop a rather large drop in business. i can name two right off the bat: jacks and caldwells both in niles (as well as all 9 casinos). i'm sure i can compile a comprehensive list if i put in the time. the point is, lets say i thought someone's post was inflamatory and intolerant to smokers (i don't really think that), i can tell him or her and we can get into an argument. i can even say that his or her post has somehow raised my blood pressure and i am now at a greater risk for a heart attack... or, i can just let opinions stand, as i should and not enter the thread or take a break from the forum. a sweeping ban doesn't help anything... it just segregates people further and punishes certain avenues of business. in this case, i believe that seperate is equal. there should be smoking establishments and non smoking establishments; its as simple as that... and if you like it stay; if you don't like it leave... and vice versa. as for blowing smoke in ones face; that's just bad manners, as is road rage and just general impoliteness (littering butts is also bad form, which has increased mind you with the smoking ban).

prior to the early eighties this would've been a non issue.

people smoked at work, on public transportation, in the homes of others (who were non smokers) and no one gave much a hoot, or hollered about it, the way they do now. why this sudden hypersensitivity to even the whiff of spent tobacco?

sorry if i came off as offensive, but as a tobacco hardened old mug, slowly being relegated to the criminal class, it raised my dander a bit to hear a complaint about, just, the odor of tobacco smoke.

that server reeked because he probably rushed his cigarette, or perhaps quickly smoked two, both which have an effect of permeating the smoker with an inordinate amount of burnt residue... hey even i don't like that sort of stink.

unfortunate for the diner, but one to 'let go' unless it were to occur again.

Boy, that makes me wish I had a time machine! Those sound like the days!