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Things my dumbass dog wants to eat...

Things my dumbass dog wants to eat...
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  • How stupid is my dog?
    Unbelievably
    24%
    10
    Colossally
    36%
    15
    Totally
    21%
    9
    Amazingly
    19%
    8
    Total votes : 42
  • Post #121 - September 5th, 2011, 8:39 am
    Post #121 - September 5th, 2011, 8:39 am Post #121 - September 5th, 2011, 8:39 am
    Hi,

    A recent spate of imposed vegetarianism, I felt an urgent need to eat real red meat. I purchased at a meat market a Porterhouse steak and two NY strips steaks. It would have been two Porterhouses, except one person's preference in meat was unknown. I didn't mind sacrificing one NY strip to medium to well done, just not a larger Porterhouse.

    Visiting a home with four dogs of varying heights, everything edible is removed from kitchen counters to avoid foodnapping. Garbage is kept in a seperate room beyond locked doors to avoid doggie garbage parties. They love their dogs, though they are vigilant to their less than charming behaviors.

    When I returned from the store, I put the steaks on top of the refrigerator to get them to room temperature. It's a tall refrigerator, there isn't easy access to the dogs and it could safely rest. I supposed.

    When it was time to prepare dinner, I reached up to find no steaks. I looked in the refrigerator hoping someone might have moved them there. Nothing. I looked in the oven, thinking they were put there for protection. I noticed it was pretty quiet with no dog hovering around. I tried to recall hearing any feeding frenzy while I napped in the next room.

    I then began looking around for overly satisfied dogs. Especially the Dalmation who can bound over kid gates with little effort. I was already clicking alternative meal plans, like Spaghetti Carbonara, if I found tattered meat packaging scattered around food coma induced dogs.

    A few minutes into my search, someone came into the kitchen opened the microwave and pulled out the steaks. In this household, the microwave is the ultimate foodsafe.

    While I came close to having a dumbass dog story, it was not to be.

    Regards,
    Cathy2

    "You'll be remembered long after you're dead if you make good gravy, mashed potatoes and biscuits." -- Nathalie Dupree
    Facebook, Twitter, Greater Midwest Foodways, Road Food 2012: Podcast
  • Post #122 - September 5th, 2011, 8:52 am
    Post #122 - September 5th, 2011, 8:52 am Post #122 - September 5th, 2011, 8:52 am
    C2, wouldn't steak-eating dogs be more smartass than dumbass?

    Love "doggie garbage parties."
    "Don't you ever underestimate the power of a female." Bootsy Collins
  • Post #123 - September 5th, 2011, 9:07 am
    Post #123 - September 5th, 2011, 9:07 am Post #123 - September 5th, 2011, 9:07 am
    David Hammond wrote:C2, wouldn't steak-eating dogs be more smartass than dumbass?

    Love "doggie garbage parties."

    I guess you are right, they are smartly seeking whatever advantage they can in the food department.

    I regularly make them dog treats. I have prepared them pig ears two ways: slow roasted and smoked.

    Regards,
    Cathy2

    "You'll be remembered long after you're dead if you make good gravy, mashed potatoes and biscuits." -- Nathalie Dupree
    Facebook, Twitter, Greater Midwest Foodways, Road Food 2012: Podcast
  • Post #124 - September 5th, 2011, 9:19 am
    Post #124 - September 5th, 2011, 9:19 am Post #124 - September 5th, 2011, 9:19 am
    Cathy2 wrote:I regularly make them dog treats. I have prepared them pig ears two ways: slow roasted and smoked.


    So, The Wife and I go around and around on this. I feed our cat (a guest; belongs to my temporarily Swiss daughter) pork all the time, and The Wife chastises, "You should NOT give pets pork." This sounds like total bullshit to me, so I keep doing it.

    As this thread proves, dogs will eat anything. I think cats will, too. Yesterday, she ate a mayo-slathered tomato slice that fell on the floor.
    "Don't you ever underestimate the power of a female." Bootsy Collins
  • Post #125 - September 5th, 2011, 9:48 am
    Post #125 - September 5th, 2011, 9:48 am Post #125 - September 5th, 2011, 9:48 am
    I believe Whiskas makes a Liver & Bacon cat food.
    I want to have a good body, but not as much as I want dessert. ~ Jason Love

    There is no pie in Nighthawks, which is why it's such a desolate image. ~ Happy Stomach

    I write fiction. You can find me—and some stories—on Facebook, Twitter and my website.
  • Post #126 - September 5th, 2011, 11:25 am
    Post #126 - September 5th, 2011, 11:25 am Post #126 - September 5th, 2011, 11:25 am
    man, we feed one of our cats anything. he likes szechuan string beans, he likes plain white rice, he likes any kind of meat he has ever met. straight up omnivore.
    Ed Fisher
    my chicago food photos

    RIP LTH.
  • Post #127 - September 5th, 2011, 11:46 am
    Post #127 - September 5th, 2011, 11:46 am Post #127 - September 5th, 2011, 11:46 am
    David Hammond wrote:
    Cathy2 wrote:I regularly make them dog treats. I have prepared them pig ears two ways: slow roasted and smoked.


    So, The Wife and I go around and around on this. I feed our cat (a guest; belongs to my temporarily Swiss daughter) pork all the time, and The Wife chastises, "You should NOT give pets pork." This sounds like total bullshit to me, so I keep doing it.


    Dogs eat pork. Cats eat mice, isn't that kinda like pork?
  • Post #128 - September 5th, 2011, 2:00 pm
    Post #128 - September 5th, 2011, 2:00 pm Post #128 - September 5th, 2011, 2:00 pm
    eatthriftcreate wrote:But the most !@#$%&-ed up thing she ever ate? A live bird ... It was about 6:30 in the morning, and I was taking her for a walk before I headed to work. I didn't notice that a robin had landed on the grass in front of us ... But Junebug did! She lunged forward, and with a quick, sickening "crunch" had the bird in her mouth. I screamed a couple times, but she just gobbled it down, oblivious to my horror. .


    My dog started with a baby bird that fell out of the tree. We would not have known had the dog not "barked it to death".

    After that, he graduated to rats. He took out three is a two week period.

    Then cats. Cats of all sizes and ages. Kittens, barn cats, and the like. Few dogs like barn cats as they are tough and mean. They learned quickly to head for a tree or a quick perch.

    Finally, he graduated to heifers. BAD mistake. They tolerated the barking, they tolerated the approach. However, he got too close and we heard a loud whimper. He starts heading back to the house. He was walking back completely dazed like a drunk on a 16 hour bendr. He left the heifers alone.
  • Post #129 - September 5th, 2011, 6:52 pm
    Post #129 - September 5th, 2011, 6:52 pm Post #129 - September 5th, 2011, 6:52 pm
    My dog is obsessed with bread. Generally he's a good dog, doesn't try to break into the kitchen even though he can - unless there's a freshly-purchased loaf on the counter. Then I will come home to the remnants of chawed-up hunks of bread everywhere. Sometimes he even eats the packaging.
    As a mattra-fact, Pie Face, you are beginning to look almost human. - Barbara Bennett
  • Post #130 - October 2nd, 2012, 9:22 am
    Post #130 - October 2nd, 2012, 9:22 am Post #130 - October 2nd, 2012, 9:22 am
    Something every dog owner can relate to!



    Enjoy!
  • Post #131 - December 4th, 2012, 11:29 am
    Post #131 - December 4th, 2012, 11:29 am Post #131 - December 4th, 2012, 11:29 am
    jaholbrook wrote:Something every dog owner can relate to!

    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/dog_paradox

    Enjoy!


    Oh man. My screen suddenly got blurry.
    "I've always thought pastrami was the most sensuous of the salted cured meats."
  • Post #132 - December 5th, 2012, 10:30 am
    Post #132 - December 5th, 2012, 10:30 am Post #132 - December 5th, 2012, 10:30 am
    Does this look like a dog who just ate a paint roller?
    Image
    Leek

    SAVING ONE DOG may not change the world,
    but it CHANGES THE WORLD for that one dog.
    American Brittany Rescue always needs foster homes. Please think about helping that one dog. http://www.americanbrittanyrescue.org
  • Post #133 - December 5th, 2012, 10:34 am
    Post #133 - December 5th, 2012, 10:34 am Post #133 - December 5th, 2012, 10:34 am
    Yes. He looks very guilty. (And cute.) How do you swallow a roller? :shock:
    I want to have a good body, but not as much as I want dessert. ~ Jason Love

    There is no pie in Nighthawks, which is why it's such a desolate image. ~ Happy Stomach

    I write fiction. You can find me—and some stories—on Facebook, Twitter and my website.
  • Post #134 - December 5th, 2012, 3:40 pm
    Post #134 - December 5th, 2012, 3:40 pm Post #134 - December 5th, 2012, 3:40 pm
    Pie Lady wrote:Yes. He looks very guilty. (And cute.) How do you swallow a roller? :shock:


    He didn't swallow it, he just chewed 1/2 of the fuzz off.

    And not only is he cute, but he knows it.
    Leek

    SAVING ONE DOG may not change the world,
    but it CHANGES THE WORLD for that one dog.
    American Brittany Rescue always needs foster homes. Please think about helping that one dog. http://www.americanbrittanyrescue.org
  • Post #135 - December 5th, 2012, 4:32 pm
    Post #135 - December 5th, 2012, 4:32 pm Post #135 - December 5th, 2012, 4:32 pm
    Ew.

    Then again my cat licks my fuzzy blanket and robe...go figure.
    I want to have a good body, but not as much as I want dessert. ~ Jason Love

    There is no pie in Nighthawks, which is why it's such a desolate image. ~ Happy Stomach

    I write fiction. You can find me—and some stories—on Facebook, Twitter and my website.
  • Post #136 - January 10th, 2014, 11:45 am
    Post #136 - January 10th, 2014, 11:45 am Post #136 - January 10th, 2014, 11:45 am
    One of my favorite threads has not been updated in a long time, I offer this:



    Lucy the Beagle has figured out that there are tasty things in the toaster oven and knows how to get them. After a roast disappeared a few weeks earlier, her guardian Rodd Scheinerman decided to set up a sting operation. He wrote on YouTube, "A few weeks before she took a roast out of the oven that had been cooking for a few hours… So I set her up. I put some nuggets in the oven… Pressed record and left. This was 7 minutes into the video."
    Cathy2

    "You'll be remembered long after you're dead if you make good gravy, mashed potatoes and biscuits." -- Nathalie Dupree
    Facebook, Twitter, Greater Midwest Foodways, Road Food 2012: Podcast
  • Post #137 - January 10th, 2014, 12:25 pm
    Post #137 - January 10th, 2014, 12:25 pm Post #137 - January 10th, 2014, 12:25 pm
    Cathy2 wrote:One of my favorite threads has not been updated in a long time, I offer this:

    Lucy the Beagle has figured out that there are tasty things in the toaster oven and knows how to get them. After a roast disappeared a few weeks earlier, her guardian Rodd Scheinerman decided to set up a sting operation. He wrote on YouTube, "A few weeks before she took a roast out of the oven that had been cooking for a few hours… So I set her up. I put some nuggets in the oven… Pressed record and left. This was 7 minutes into the video."

    That's hysterical. I especially like how she moves the chairs into position.
    -Mary
  • Post #138 - January 11th, 2014, 1:16 pm
    Post #138 - January 11th, 2014, 1:16 pm Post #138 - January 11th, 2014, 1:16 pm
    Which means you probably can't show that video in the public schools of several southern states.

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