Artisinal Mayo Store in Brooklyn

Article about instant dislike of the concept of an Artisinal Mayonnaise store:
Source: http://dangerousminds.net/comments/arti ... n_headache

Also, actual Artisinal Mayo store website featuring such flavors as Black Garlic, Lime Pickle, White Truffle, White Cheddar, at $6 to $9 per 4oz. jar.

Why would I hate the mayonnaise artisans? I mean, hey, I’ve often waxed affectionate over the esoteric intellectual motivations of my dearest friends. My favorite people always have some sort of strange specialty; one friend with an encyclopedic knowledge of 1980s queercore punk rock, another a talented typesetter, passionate over fonts. How does artisanal mayo inspire such ire, while the relentless academic pursuit of a near-forgotten Marxist inspires such tenderness? Could I ever become endeared to these people, as I am endeared to my dearest of comrades? Could I really see them, as lovely to me as my own loved ones who know every Richard Pryor routine by heart, or who would stirringly lecture you about art nouveau toilets?

No. I could not. Because it’s artisanal mayonnaise, and it’s ****ing stupid.

Kinda reminds me of the Rice Pudding Place. Remember? People were all, "Hey, they do have good rice pudding -- but is a place that only serves rice pudding really viable?" And it turned out to be a money laundering operation set up by Certain People. (Who knew they had such a quirky sense of humor?)

Of course the Artisanal Mayo Place is a totally different outfit. I'm not implying they're connected.

Yeee-Haw! I'm headin' to Brooklyn!




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Or maybe my objection is feminist. Is it the mythos of a condiment once fine, now ubiquitous to every insipid kitchen, making a mockery of “feminine” labor? What was once a delicate combination of oil and water, a volatile emulsion requiring expertise to produce, now only elicits the vulgar industrial tubs of my food service days. Mass produced mayo was meant to simplify, save time and enrich the lives of women, like the vacuum cleaner. But with the vacuum cleaner came the standard of wall-to-wall carpeting, slightly different dull labor and a more stringent barometer of cleanliness. Have our innovations in modern domesticity only made domestic life that much more banal and disaffected, haunting us like some sort of Betty Friedan nightmare?

Um, it takes me about 1 minute to make "artisan" mayo with my immersion blader. No female oppression required.

Either way, as a former denizen of Brooklyn, I had tasted this mayo and it is fine, but contains some of the same ingredients as mass produced mayo (canola oil, stabilizer blend ), so I never bought any. I think there is a market for mayo that is just olive oil or a blend of olive and animal fat like I make, but this artisan mayo is something I could make by just putting some fancy ingredients in with some reasonably middle end grocery store brand.