Spicy or not spicy?

When eating at some of the LTH recommended Thai, Indian and Chinese restaurants, how might I know how spicy a certain dish is? Two of us don't like spicy/hot (as even in jalapenos, we pick them off) and two of the family like some heat.

Also, is enough English spoken at these reastaurants by the staff that we could simply ask how spicy or hot a certain dish is?

At home here, our Chinese restaurants mark the dish in red if it is considered spicy/hot. Some of the Chinese dishes can be altered if one doesn't like spicy/hot and simply asks.

At a place like Lao Sze Chuan, they indicate on the menu if a dish is spicy by using one, two or three peppers. Not everyone at LSC is fluent in English, but I'm sure they are good enough to understand to moderate the heat of a dish. Of course, if you are not a fan of heat, be careful with LSC's cabbage, which is served to start the meal.

I doubt you'll encounter much difficulty with language at most Thai and Indian places, including Spoon Thai. You can just ask if a dish is spicy, and you can ask them to moderate the heat of a dish and for those that want more heat, ask for hot peppers on the side. You'll probably encounter considerably more spice at a Thai restaurant than an Indian restaurant.

In short, I'm sure you'll be easily able to communicate your desire for minimal spice everywhere you go.

Most Indian restaurants are very good at pointing out the exceptionally spicy dishes (and, as a general rule- if you don't like spice, do NOT order the vindaloo), and heat can usually be moderated a bit.

I think most places will gladly make things not spicy or without peppers. The exception would be dishes that are inherently spicy like "Beef with Chili Peppers". For instance, a Mexican restaurant usually would not have a spicy and non-spicy version of a mole sauce. However, if you let them know you don't want spice, I am sure they will direct you to the milder dishes. The problem arises not when you want something without any hot peppers, but when you want a dish "medium" spicy. What constitutes "medium" hot will not only vary from cuisine to cuisine, but from restaurant to restaurant, and possibly from cook to cook. What is medium to somebody from India may not be medium to somebody from Indiana. I find that Chinese and Indian restaurants (with some exceptions) tend to be more conservative with the heat when dealing with American palates. With Thai restaurants, "medium hot" could fall anywhere on the chart. However, I think most places are pretty good at judging a customer's tolerance for heat. Remember, you can always add hot sauce or peppers at the table. In fact, it is nice to have a little spiciness "headroom" so you can sample the condiments.

Thanks! I had hoped that the spicyness could be altered to our gringa tongues/stomachs. The "boys" can add whatever they like, as long as the "girls" don't have to taste it!

Medium hot is usually too hot for daughter and me. We like different spices, but not the heat that makes our lips and tongues burn!